Coda Part 5

5.

“She has to be getting drugged,” Clark said, pacing the living room. This had been one of the worst nights of his life. The things Chloe had said had hurt Clark like hell—because nothing quite hurt like the truth. He remembered every word, and when he tried to come up with a defense, he couldn’t.

He and Chloe had gotten so close after she learned his secret. They’d even become a couple in every way that mattered, except for sex. He’d loved her, had even wanted to try going to the next level, but Jimmy had gotten in the way. He thought now that maybe he should have fought for her.

But he hadn’t fought for her. He’d gone back to trying to get the perfect life with Lana, because that had been the dream he’d so stubbornly held on to. He was happy with Lana, that was true, but was he as complete with her as he had been during the year and a half when it had just been him and Chloe in on his secret? He didn’t think so, now that he viewed that part of his life in retrospect.

In many ways, he thought he’d been a lousy friend, even then. Chloe had waited and waited for him, and then decided to think of her own happiness by giving a relationship with Jimmy Olsen a shot, and how had he behaved? Like a jealous schoolboy. He’d put a dampener on her happiness, because he was being selfish, trying to keep her to himself. In fact, now that he looked back on it, he’d been rude to anyone who showed Chloe interest, or had been willing to openly see her as the beautiful woman she was.

Now she was with his worst enemy. He blamed himself for everything Lana ever did wrong, and now he was doing the same regarding Chloe because he felt it really was his fault. He had replaced Chloe with Lana—in every way. After the closeness he and Chloe had shared, he’d turned his back on her as soon as Lana came back into his life. Even when Chloe was with Jimmy, she’d always put him first,.

She always put me first…

Guilt was like a gnawing, clawing animal in his guts. He’d always taken for granted that Chloe put him first in her life, to the detriment of everything else—her love life, her career, everything. He hadn’t been willing to do the same. Instead, as soon as Lana and a perfect domestic life had come within reach, he’d all but turned his back on Chloe, putting her not just second in his heart, but last. He had Kara in his life too, and he'd gotten so wrapped up in dealing with her that Chloe had been shifted to the bottom of the list-unless he needed something. Then she was the first one he ran to.

“Clark?”

Lana stood in the kitchen entrance, watching him. He felt a sudden rush of dislike for her, but reined it in immediately. It wouldn't be fair to blame Lana for his failures. She didn’t tell him to turn his back on Chloe.

But she didn’t tell me that maybe I should be a better friend to Chloe, either.

He’d always known that Lana was a little insecure about his friendship with Chloe. She’d always known that he shared something with Chloe that no sexual relationship could ever quite compare to. Maybe Lana had been aware of just how much he was hurting Chloe by pulling away from her. Had she intentionally seduced him into breaking his dinner date with Chloe that night, to drive a wedge between them?

“The night I was supposed to take Chloe out to dinner. You insisted I stay home with you. Why? Why not let me go hang out with my best friend for one night?”

Lana looked pissed. “You can’t blame this on me, Clark. If you really wanted to go out with Chloe that night, you could have told me no.”

“If I recall correctly, I did tell you no. Four times.”

“But I badgered you into it, is that what you’re saying?”

“Yes,” he said. He was angry, and getting angrier.

Lana approached him slowly. “You’re trying to have two best friends, Clark, and that’s a hard thing to do, especially if they’re both women who’re in love with you, and want you for the same reason. You made your choice, and it was me, now Chloe can’t deal with it.”

“You can’t either, can you? You can’t deal with me wanting to spend time with Chloe.”

“I can deal. I won’t lie and say I like it. Would you want me hanging out with a man you knew was in love with me?”

“If he was as good a friend to you as Chloe had been to me, yes.”

“Even if you thought that maybe I returned his feelings, at least on some level?”

“I know you're talking about you and Lex, Lana, but there's a big difference with your friendship with Lex, and mine with Chloe. You know I’m not going to cheat on you with Chloe, and you know she's not trying to break us up, the way Lex had been.”

“The question is would you want me with a male friend like that, even if he wasn't trying to break us up?”

“If he meant to you what Chloe meant to me, then I’d want you to hang on to that friendship, even if it meant leaving me sometimes to hang out with him, yes. It’s very rare to have a friend like Chloe, Lana. If you’d ever had a friend like that, you’d know how important it is to stay connected with them.”

He started for the door. Lana was suddenly the last person he wanted to be around now.

“Where are you going?”

“To find Chloe.”

“How? She doesn’t live with Lois anymore, and you don't have her new address.”

“I can pick her heartbeat out of every heartbeat in Metropolis. I can single out her voice, I know what her breathing sounds like.”

Lana looked hurt to hear this. “Can you do that for…me?”

But Clark was gone, and seconds later, he stood in front of the Daily Planet. He allowed it all to come in, every sound in the city. He heard every car, every cat meow, dog bark, every scream, every song, every word, every sound of passion and violence, every laugh, every breath. Chloe wasn’t in the Daily Planet, so he relaxed, and allowed himself to filter everything out until he heard that familiar heart rhythm, or that familiar breath, or that most familiar voice. He finally found her, crying, and still focusing on her, he ran for the sound of her voice.

She was in a high-rise across from Oliver Queen’s place. He was about to force his way into the building and go up, but he heard a second voice—Lex Luthor.

“You need to forget Clark, Chloe. He’s obviously forgotten you. He never really cared about you. He just settled for being with you whenever he couldn't have Lana.”

Clark made his way to Oliver’s place and went to a wall that afforded him a view of Chloe’s place, even though there was no window. She was sitting on the bed, naked, her hair wet from a shower. Lex pulled off his coat and sat next to her, rubbing her back, a look of wicked glee in his eyes that Chloe couldn’t see. Seeing Lex with his hands on Chloe, filling her head with lies, made Clark’s blood boil. He had to make conscious effort not to blast heat through Oliver’s wall.

“I know that,” Chloe said.

“And it hurts like hell, I know," Lex said soothingly. It made Clark's teeth grind hard together. "Come here. Let me comfort you.”

Lex turned Chloe’s face toward him, eased her onto her back, and put a hand boldly between her legs and kissed her deeply.

“No!” Clark shouted, filled with disgust and anger. His hands nearly broke through the plaster as he watched Lex violate Chloe.

“Clark?” Oliver was there, coming to stand beside him. “Something wrong with my wall?”

But Clark could barely hear Oliver. Lex was trailing kisses down Chloe’s stomach. Her heartbeat increased, her breaths came quicker, more evenly as she stopped crying and gave in to the lust Lex’s touch aroused in her. Clark was almost sure he could smell her, even from here.

“Clark!”

Clark looked away. He couldn’t watch anymore, he couldn’t watch Lex unzipping his trousers and thrusting into Chloe. He looked at Oliver’s face instead.

“Oliver. What are you doing here?”

 

“I live here,” Oliver said dryly. “Lois called me, said there was an emergency she needed help fixing, but wouldn’t say what it was over the phone. What are you doing here, Clark? Are you peeping at someone across the—”

“It’s Chloe. She’s with Lex. She’s letting him…letting him…”

Oliver’s brows had never gotten closer to his hairline. “Our Chloe? Chloe Sullivan? She’s having sex with Lex Luthor? No. I don’t believe it.”

“See for yourself.” Clark said, pointing at the wall.

“I would, if I could see through walls, but I can’t, Clark. Come here, have a drink.”

“Alcohol doesn’t affect me.”

“Okay, then I’ll have a drink.”

Oliver poured himself a scotch and downed it in one, then poured another. He was starting to look angry. “Chloe and Lex. What’s she thinking?”

“It’s my fault,” Clark said.

“How so?”

He began to explain everything that had happened between him and Chloe over the past few months. Oliver listened quietly, and shook his head.

“It’s her choice,” Oliver said. “It’s not your fault.”

“I drove her to him, just like I did Lana! Don’t try to absolve me of this.”

“Let’s crash their little party,” Oliver said, finishing his second scotch. He walked around behind Clark and surprised him by hopping onto his back.

“What the hell are you doing?”

“I need a ride. I don’t feel like going green, and I can’t keep up with you, so run. Don’t feel self-conscious. Bart gives me zippy lifts all the time.”

He clapped Clark on his shoulder a couple of times.

“Giddyup, cowboy.”

“I don’t think Chloe wants company right now.”

“Too bad for her. We’re heroes, Clark, and there’s a damsel in distress that needs saving. A damsel we both care about very much, so go.”

Clark didn’t need more urging. He made sure Oliver was secure, and then took off at top speed.

****

Clark

unceremoniously broke the lock on the door and pushed it open. At once both he and Oliver could hear Lex and Chloe straining to reach climax, and just as they crossed the living room they did.

“First, you’ve got to calm down, Clark, before you do something you'll regret,” Oliver said, seeing the rage in Clark’s face, but Clark pushed past Oliver, ignoring his advice, and pushed the bedroom door open. He was ready to break Lex’s neck. The smug sneer on Lex’s face didn’t do anything to ease that violent feeling in Clark, neither did the livid expression on Chloe’s face.

“Sorry, Clark, but you’re a bit late. Chloe’s made it clear she won’t be part of a ménage a trois. Oh, Oliver, I didn’t see you.”

“Get up, Lex.”

“I’ll need a few minutes for that one, I’m a bit spent at the moment.”

“Get out, both of you!” Chloe shouted.

Clark started forward, actually growling with rage, but Oliver jumped between them, while Chloe disentangled herself from Lex and pulled a sheet up to cover herself. “Wait a second, Clark! Lex, if you know what’s good for you, you’ll get up now. Chloe, get dressed. You, come with me.”

Oliver urged Clark toward the door so Chloe and Lex could get dressed in private. A few minutes later Lex emerged, fully dressed, smelling strongly of sweat, and Chloe’s juices. Clark pushed past him to go into the bedroom, where Chloe stared out of her window at the clock tower apartment Oliver used when in Metropolis, wrapped tightly in her sheets.

“You have Ollie with you,” Chloe said softly. “I’m guessing you were in his apartment, watching me, and he convinced you to barge in here, unwanted.”

“…you drugging Chloe, Lex?” Oliver was saying in the next room. "Because that's the only way she'd ever let you into her bed."

“I didn’t need to drug her. Clark did all the set up work for me.”

“Get out, Lex,” Oliver said, disgusted.

“Do you hear that, Chloe? Lex is just using you to get at me. Why can't you see that?”

“You think I don't know that? I was using him, to get at you too. It was a mutually beneficial arrangement,” she said. Her voice was oddly flat. It was unsettling.

“Would you at least go and wash his stink off yourself?” Clark asked.

Chloe snorted. "Go to hell, Clark," she said, as she heard the door close behind Lex; she was relieved he was gone. She wasn’t sure what Clark might do to Lex, as angry as he was now.

“I know I haven’t been the perfect friend, Chloe, but you’re going too far.”

“I thought I told you and Lana to stay out of my life, that I didn’t want anything to do with you ever again. What’s your problem with all of this, really, Clark?”

Chloe stood and faced him. Clark couldn’t avoid looking her over this time. She was freshly fucked and beautiful. Her skin was flushed and covered in sweat. It was Lex’s scent all over her that sickened Clark and ruined the effect.

“Did you ever stop to consider that I’m a woman and not some soulless tool that you can use to do your thinking in a crisis? Did it ever occur to you that I have needs, feelings, and desires, the same as you, or Lana?”

“Of course I know that.”

"Why didn't you ever see that, then? No, wait. I already know the answer to that one: Lana. Just...why are you still coming around?”

“I’m trying to be your friend, Chloe.”

“We don’t have a friendship anymore. I look at you now, Clark, and I feel so much disgust and disappointment. You just seem like such a fool to me. A self-absorbed fool. All you ever cared about is what I could give you, what I could do for you."

"That's just not true, Chloe," Clark said, somewhat weakly. Chloe had never said such things to him before. He was almost invincible, and he never would have believed it was possible for such a small woman to hurt him so much with nothing but her words. For all his strength, he felt like the weakest man alive, listening to the person who'd been his best friend using all the right words to beat him down, and cut his heart.

"I don't know what I ever saw in you. I don’t know why I wasted so many years of my life pining away after you, believing the little hints you would drop that you were just about ready to take our friendship to the next level. That maybe, someday, you'd give me a chance. That just maybe, someday, you'd try to love me the way that I'd always loved you.”

Clark looked down. He had been guilty of just that, of keeping her in his back pocket, so that if someone else ever came along, she’d still put him first above them.

"I hate you for that," she whispered. She meant those words. He could see it in her eyes. "Leave, Clark. Get out of my life, and stay out."

“Clark,” Oliver said from the doorway. He was looking across the room, rather than at Chloe. “Maybe you should just go, like she asked.”

Clark looked at Chloe and he knew that this time, she wasn’t going to forgive. This time, he couldn’t talk her out of her anger. There was too much hurt that had been built up over years, not just the past few months, and it had all come crashing down with a little help and attention from Lex Luthor. But maybe it would have even without Lex. People can only hold in their hurts for so long before they either confronted them, or were destroyed by them. Clark would rather have Chloe confront these things, than let them destroy her. People grew apart, he realized, and he could feel Chloe slipping from him.

I’ve lost her, Clark thought. This time it was for real. She was gone. She really wasn’t his friend anymore, and he felt as though part of his soul had just died.

He moved too quickly for either Chloe or Oliver to fully comprehend until he was gone from the room, leaving a breeze behind him. Oliver finally looked at Chloe, and she realized he had a bottle of champagne from the bar Lex had stocked in his hand.

“Take a shower and get dressed, Chloe. You’re coming with me.”

Chapter 6